Chick-Fil-A is the last fast food restaurant on Earth…

Chick-Fil-A is the last fast food restaurant on Earth… At least that’s the case in my eyes. Unfortunately they don’t sell pizza and burgers. If they did, they’d certainly corner the market. Or, maybe I should avoid this place like the plague because the owner doesn’t like this or that. I hear he doesn’t like my favorite baseball team – Oh no. I’m going to McZero’s…

Anyway. I’ve mentioned Chick-Fil-A on my blog before in my awesomeChicken Sandwiches” post. Their chicken sandwiches are awesome. But I’ve recently discovered other reasons to prefer Chick-Fil-A over lesser fast food restaurants…

1. The food is, for the most part, better. I don’t know if other fast food restaurants offer a chicken salad sandwich – but this damned thing is unreal! Brett ‘ll back me up (right?). Soft whole grain bread with chicken salad and a legitimate, big piece of crispy, fresh dark green lettuce. Not that wet, floppy crap you get at McDonalds or Burger King. It’s a touch sweet – I think there might be some relish – I’m not sure. I don’t care enough to research it. It’s just a darn good sandwich.

2. Holy F’ing BREAKFAST. Their bacon, egg and cheese biscuit is so damned good that I’m not even going to blog about it. Yes, when something is really good – you want to tell everyone. This egg sandwich is so good that it exists in a reality so far beyond the deepest nooks and crannies of our imagination’s eighteenth dimension – that I’m just not going to say anything about it. Perhaps I just don’t have the words…

3. Service. What? The… Hi. F&%K!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

4. Now about that service. What?

5. Okay, I can do this now… When it’s busy – during peak times – they send nice, personable, well-dressed employees outside to take orders to speed things up. Yes, it was 100 degrees today – but the young man and woman standing outside to take orders did so with a smile and addressed me as “sir”, then asked my name – then continued to address me by name until they sent me to the window. When I got to the window… “Good afternoon, Sal. Your total is $4.95″. I paid and I got, “Thank you, Sal. Have a wonderful day!”. — When it’s not so busy and they take your order at the speaker – they’re just as pleasant and leave off with a, “Thank you! It’ll be my pleasure to serve you at the window”…

What do you get everywhere else? “Hurry up, give me your money and get the F$@K outta here. I’m busy playing on Instagram and stalking my next puncture on Tinder”.

So that’s it for me. No more crappy fast food restaurants. When I want something quick – I’ll go to Chick-Fil-A. I don’t care how much they hate the Yankees…

I can’t stop having sex with multiple prostitutes simultaneously on a daily basis.

Backpage won’t accept Visa and Mastercard anymore. So now my friggin’ Mazda For Sale ad can’t be “bumped up” to the top for the $2.00 that I’d normally pay – because I don’t have a credit card that Backpage.com accepts. No, American Express won’t work either.

All the major credit card companies have banned Backpage.com transactions – because people are still having sex. Oh, God – save the children! Two consenting adults are having sex and somebody is making money that can’t be taxed because it’s a cash transaction.

You do realize that THAT sole reason is why sex is illegal if there’s any money involved. What other reason would there be? Because the government cares – about – … about … I don’t know. About what? When a man takes a woman out for dinner and the movies – and has sex with her afterwards — that’s okay?

So because people are having sex I can’t continue using Backpage.com. I guess Backpage.com will eventually give in and make the posting of sexual services against their rules. But that hasn’t even stopped it from happening on Craigslist. Right? Read the news. I did a Google search for why Mastercard was banned and enough news articles state that sex ads are still on Craigslist – just disguised…

Prostitution in 2016: Go to the movies or dinner, buy popcorn, pay the cashier or waiter/waitress $200 or $300, go to the bathroom and tell the prostitute to take the change when it comes back – “you can give it to me later”, go have sex and forget to ask for the change back before you leave. Now it’s legal enough…

Mayonnaise Lovers Rejoice! #mayonnaise #kirkland

To all my mayonnaise fanatics spanning from sea to sea – from continent to continent – I hear by declare Kirkland Signature Real Mayonnaise SAFE! Safe to replace your favorite name brand Mayonnaise. Safe to use on sandwiches! In tuna fish! On tuna fish SANDWICHES! On CHICKEN sandwiches… Even on Pizza if you like…

Kirkland Signature Real Mayonnaise
Kirkland Signature Real Mayonnaise

Food For Thought

I recently lost some weight after having eaten bad food. No, I didn’t vomit it out – let me tell you what happened. My stomach is kind of sensitive. So when something goes wrong like eating bad food that’s either old (restaurant squeezing every last dollar out of their supply) or dirty (idiots at a restaurant handling the food before I eat it), I tend to have issues for awhile. This time it was about ten or eleven days that my stomach was being finicky afterwards.

So I wasn’t eating much. And I lost a noticeable amount of weight. I wasn’t going to the gym. I was hardly burning any calories because I sit down all day – and pretty much all night as well. I was practically immobile but still lost a good bit of weight. Six or seven pounds… This made me think back to an article I read which stated that exercise isn’t the best way to lose weight. Reason being: the more you exercise, the more you need to eat. And this is true.

Now while this isn’t really such a terrible thing on the surface, there are two things that concern me greatly…

1. Eating = Death. What?! In this day and age it’s the food that’s killing us. I’m going to hope and pray that you’re intelligent and informed enough to know exactly what I’m talking about so that I don’t have to go into a whole separate conversation to cover education on this topic as to WHY our food is killing us. Okay?

2. Overworking the digestive system. Our F’ing IMMUNE system LIVES in our digestive system. That being said, can you think of any good reason why you’d want your digestive system to be in top condition? Being in top condition means not over-working it with loads of food to digest.

Most of my life I’ve been a big eater. Yes, I exercise a lot to stay in good shape. However, while I’m in good shape on the outside, and exercise is keeping the rest of my body healthy, I’m putting unneeded stress on my digestive system.

So now it makes sense to me that while you DO want to exercise consistently, you don’t want to over do it. ESPECIALLY if you’re trying to lose weight. If you want to lose weight you need to limit your caloric intake. Don’t just do what I’ve been doing all these years: eating a lot and exercising more. There’s no reason to stress your body and digestive system – just eat less.

I realize this isn’t always easy. Most of us love to eat. But try to keep that habit of excessive eating down to a day or two per week. On those days you should exercise a little harder. When all is said and done you need to find a healthier hobby than eating…

I’ve been driving a 2014 Toyota Corolla for a week…

Okay. I’m not going to lie. This car, unlike the 2014 Toyota Camry I drove last week, is a little…

Wait. Okay. I actually put this blog aside until the following morning. I don’t want to be too critical about the car. It’s a good car. But now I know what I want to say about it… It’s slow. My goodness is this car weak. It’s got a 1.8 liter four cylinder engine that sounds like it’s being overworked with the least bit of acceleration.

I’m sure this is no different from other cars in the Corolla’s class. But wow. For a guy who’s been driving high performance cars for a long, long time – this one is a bit difficult to deal with. I really need to go into “Zen Mode” and just drive like a grandma (or at least my impression of one). I’m not overtaking ‘anyone’ in this car. If I’m on the highway and I need to get over – I’m going to need to wait until everybody else passes before I can change lanes.

But I don’t want to give anyone the impression that this is a bad car. It’s actually roomy inside and pretty comfortable. I haven’t taken it on any long trips so I can’t discuss how the seating feels in such a situation – but I’m sure it’s no better than the 2014 Toyota Camry LE that I drove last week. It’s not quiet inside but that’s not what people expect when driving this car. It doesn’t handle very well – but it feels plenty safe on the road. It’s a good car – but that’s all it is. It’s a car. Basic transportation. And for the price – it’s not a bad deal.

Oh, I forgot to mention. I’m getting a little over 33 miles per gallon. That’s pretty awesome. It’s strange looking at the gas gauge and hardly ever seeing it move. This is a great car to drive if you’re looking for basic, reliable transportation in a pretty decent looking package. Yes, I think the new Corolla is pretty decent looking. And it’s not going to cost much to own – especially when it comes to gas.

I wasn’t born yesterday. And neither were you! Please share this message…

Do yourself and everyone around you a big favor – don’t believe everything you hear or read. You’re smarter than that. There’s so much ridiculous stuff going on these days – especially in the news – and especially related to politics. Take the latest news for instance, “Taliban terrorists kill 145, mostly children” – a school was allegedly attacked. Who knows what really happened?! Have American soldiers ever killed kids in a school? Maybe it was an accident. Maybe there were enemy soldiers hiding there. Maybe the story is completely different than whatever actually happened. Maybe it had nothing to do with the “Taliban”. They allegedly made a statement saying it was “revenge”. Really? They actually WANT everyone in the world to hate them? Sure, that’s believable.

My suggestion to you is to remember that you were not born yesterday. In fact, please – say it to yourself right now. “I was not born yesterday”. And while you’re at it take a deep breath. If things around you – especially politics in the news – do not directly affect you, your family, loved ones or close friends – ignore them. It’s not worth the stress. Stress is a killer. You’ve heard it before. It even causes cancer. Stop worrying about what’s going on 5,000 miles away – or even 5 miles away from whatever is important to YOU. You’ll live longer. And you’ll be happier. Why be/get mad about all this nonsense that’s going on in the world? You/We don’t even know what’s REAL anymore. We really, truly have no idea…

Pay attention to YOU and YOURS. Please. Post a link to this blog so other people get the message. It’s an important message. Here’s the link to copy and paste: http://wp.me/p4PtEn-bz

I drove a 4 cylinder 2014 Toyota Camry LE for a week

I’m a car nut. A certified, official, 100% car nut. I’ve had this problem for a long time. Over the years I’ve owned some pretty nice cars. For some odd reason having a nice car is very important to me. It’s an obsession. A sickness. Whatever.

Now that we’ve got that out of the way…

My current car is a 900 horsepower modified Mercedes-Benz E63 AMG. The car is awesome. My previous cars were a 2012 Lexus LS460L, a 2008 Lexus LS460L, a 2007 BMW 335i, a 2007 BMW 750Li, a 2006 Cadillac Escalade ESV, a 2005 Lexus LS430, a 2000 Cadillac DeVille DTS, a 1995 Cadillac Fleetwood Brougham, a 1995 Cadillac Eldorado ETC, a 1987 Chevrolet Corvette and so many Camaro’s, Firebirds and old Cadillacs (and a bunch of others) that I could go on here forever…

Why am I telling you this? Well, because I’m accustomed to driving some very high quality automobiles. I’ve driven rental Nissan Altimas, Chevrolet Malibus, Hyundai Sonatas, this, that, and the other one… I’ve always heard such good things about the Toyota Camry – so I specifically wanted to get a solid week of driving in one…

I’m impressed.

The car did everything it was supposed to do perfectly. It had plenty of power around town. Maybe it’s a little weak on the highway but I’m sure the V6 would fix that problem. The suspension was soft but the car handled well – even when going fast around bends on the highway when the road had bumps or holes (the Nissan Altima sedan did NOT do well on this same road). Steering was comfortable. It was pretty quiet inside. It hardly used any gas. It’s like the perfect car. No wonder it’s the best selling car in America.

My ONLY complaint is that after 90 minutes of driving, the seat becomes uncomfortable. For most people this would never be an issue. I don’t know if there are nicer seats in higher end models (perhaps the XLE) – but this is definitely an issue (though a minor one) if you’re taking a long trip. It’s not THAT bad – just not as comfortable as I’m used to. Again, the cars I’ve been driving are made to be “perfect” for everything.

The new, redesigned 2015 Toyota Camry is quite a bit nicer inside and out. If I can ever get over my “car obsession”, I just might buy a new Camry. I really do like it…

edit 05.07.2015 – I do need to mention that, since I’ve had more time in a Toyota Camry lately, (I believe it’s a 2012) there’s one problem. I notice that at highway speeds steering is too light. I actually need to pay close attention to keep the car rolling perfectly straight as the slightest movement in the steering wheel turns the car a bit. And since the steering is so loose – this happens frequently.

I see exactly what people mean about cars like the Mazda 6 being easier to navigate with steering that’s more stiff and solid. Now I do believe this issue has been rectified in the newest Toyota Camry model – the 2015… Especially so in the SE and XSE versions. I’ll share my thoughts on that if and when I drive one…