Why is it that your friends always want you to drink too much?

I don’t know how it is for you – but when I go out drinking with my friends – they’re always trying to get me to drink more than necessary. For example – I could buy a bottle of saki, drink it, buy another and then “milk” that one for awhile. However, one of my friends will always be there filling my shot glass as quickly as I empty it into my stomach.

Why do they do this? Do your friends do the same thing?

I drink with specific goals in mind – to relax and get that heavily buzzed feeling. That makes me happy. Drinking more than that – getting drunk to the point where I can’t walk straight, have slurred speech or act like an idiot – is more than I want. To me, drinking passed the point where I want to be is like driving ten miles passed my destination. It doesn’t make any sense.

Regardless, somebody is always there trying to feed me more drinks. What satisfaction do people get out of seeing somebody drink too much alcohol to the point they no longer feel “good”? If you have any thoughts, opinions, criticisms or stories of your own that you’d like to share – please comment. :)

Ugly American Men and Chinese Women

I was scrolling through Google Plus (I farking LOVE Google Plus) and found this weird post and discussion about how terrible Chinese women are – entitled, “My Chinese Wife Set a Trap!“. Since commenting is only enabled if you send your thoughts to the webmaster – and looking at the site tells me that my opinion would never make it public – I’ll leave my response right here on my own blog…

First of all. You cannot lump ALL Chinese women into one specific category like this guy does. I’m sure there are some gold diggers out there. In fact, it would be extremely odd if there weren’t. All kinds of people like and want money. Unfortunately, money is extremely important these days. Without it, you cannot survive.

What I’m gathering from the responses is that Chinese women are “generally” nicer to “men” than, say, American women. Further reading elsewhere tells me that, “GENERALLY”, western women are more fussy, demanding, blah blah blah – than eastern women are – most specifically – Asian women.

In ANY relationship – both people have to bring certain qualities to the table. If you’re an ugly man and expect to have (and retain) a beautiful wife – you MUST bring something valuable to the table. This guy apparently wasn’t very attractive – and he didn’t really have a good job. If you’re an ugly man you damn well better either make a lot of money or be really good in bed. And you’re not going to be really good in bed if you’re ugly. You’re just not going to have had enough experience. Maybe if you have a huge penis your wife can/will have something to brag about to her friends. I don’t know. Maybe that would be enough. Maybe. If you’re lucky…

If you’re ugly and you want a beautiful wife – and you don’t have a lot of money – and you don’t have a big penis – GET your F’ing ass in the GYM and at least get into good shape. For God’s sake at least give your woman SOMETHING to be proud of you for… But don’t expect to bring NOTHING meaningful to the table in a relationship with a beautiful woman. Life just isn’t that easy and nothing is free. You know that. So stop complaining and get your act together…

Can I help you find something?

Is it just me or does anyone else avoid shopping at certain stores because of hawk-like sales people who just won’t leave you alone? I realize they’re lonely and bored with nothing to do – but it really annoys the hell out of me. At my local Dillard’s – as SOON as you open the door at the entrance – they’re honing in on you. Once you step foot in their direction – they’re ON you like a hawk swooping down to peck you to death.

I just so happen to enter my local shopping mall from the Dillard’s entrance and there’s a lot of really nice men’s clothing at that specific spot. I used to go look a bit and I’d surely buy a few things but I can’t stand feeling like I’m walking into a car dealership – which everybody, almost universally, hates…

Does upper level management know how this makes people feel? Does it actually earn more revenue for the business this way? I mean, I suppose enough people are pressured into buying things by these sales people – that the owner of the company and stock holders and blah blah blah – all make much more money as a result. I can only hope because I certainly hope this isn’t happening “at a loss” for the company.

Anyway. I imagine that since I’m a space alien I could be alone in this feeling. Let me know. Okay? Seriously. Hit the damned comment button and tell me how you feel. I’d really like to know.

Male model arrested, deported for smiling in cologne advertisement

Have you been through any department stores lately? I’ve been in the marketing field so I notice all the advertisements for clothing, cologne, perfume, etcetera. Female models are almost always smiling. Male models almost always have a serious look on their face – but the surroundings and situations don’t always dictate a necessity for such a serious look.

I figured out why this is happening. It’s because all male models are sucking their cheeks in. When did cheeks get such a bad rap? I can understand if you have a pound of cheek hanging off each side of your face – but these guys all have ultra low body fat to begin with. Do they really need to look like they’re starving? Is that the look that women like these days? Serious, sophisticated, without appetite…

If you notice these ads while you’re shopping around this holiday season and ask yourself, “Where are all the smiles?” – rest assured you know – they’ve been replaced with the look of a man sucking his cheeks down his own throat. Protruding cheeks are no longer acceptable in our ever-growing crazy society.

While walking around the mall yesterday – I did spot one guy sort of smiling in an ad. He was straining to get that grin on his face while holding his cheeks in between his teeth. It was not a very natural look. One guy in another ad had his jaw bone almost coming out of his skin. This is the look? Really?

If they don’t have cosmetic surgery to give men the appearance of concave cheeks, I’m sure it’ll be available soon. Perhaps you can take that idea and run with it. You’ll be a billionaire before you know it…

Oh and before I sign out of here… The ad below isn’t really a great example – but an example nonetheless. I need to take some pictures next time I walk around in the mall. Especially one of the guy with the jaw bone sticking out of his face…

What’s your opinion? I’d love to know…

concave cheeks
Concave Cheeks – The Look

Edit: Okay. I went to the mall again today. Here’s the ad with the guy who has a bone sticking out of his face. What the FOGGLE doggle is going on here? Maybe we all need surgery to add this bone as a feature if we’re thin and you still can’t see it. (Click the image to expand to full resolution)


This weekend I had an experience with Uber and Lyft

So I wanted to go out and have a few drinks this past Saturday night and didn’t want to be driving. I started using Uber a month or two ago and really like the service. This was my third “Uber” and, as usual, it went well. The car/driver picks you up right away (usually about 5 minutes) and before you know it you’re where you want to be. You don’t need to bring money with you as everything is paid for through the app – including tip. This makes things really easy.

To note, Uber seems to be a good bit less expensive than a taxi cab – and there’s a TON less waiting time to get picked up. Now I HAVE heard about Uber rates being more expensive at peak times when things are busy – especially in well populated areas. I was in downtown Orlando this past Saturday and got to experience that.

My drive down town cost $30.00. The drive BACK would have cost $300… You read that right… $300. It was a 25 minute drive. So I was either going to call a cab or try Lyft. I downloaded the Lyft app, requested a ride (which arrived in less than 5 minutes) – total price: $35.00 (including the $10.00 tip I gave the driver).

The end.

2014 Cadillac XTS Review

I currently have a Cadillac XTS for a loaner. I drove it home last night, to the gym this morning, to the mall this afternoon and I just got home. I like it. It’s nearly 100% traditional “Cadillac”. Even the engine feels kinda traditional in a late 70s / early 80s sense (it can’t move out of it’s own way). Around town power is perfectly adequate. The ride is smooth but it still handles well (though not floaty like a traditional Cadillac). The engine feels very smooth unless you need passing power or need to merge into traffic moving over 40 miles per hour – then it’s a bit loud and it sounds like it’s struggling. I’m sure the twin turbo XTS – even with it’s reduced torque – is great. The seats are 110% traditional Cadillac. There’s no support but that’s fine with me because this car isn’t for carving corners. It’s pretty quiet inside. I don’t like the capacitive controls but it only took me about ten minutes to get used to. No big deal, really – but I definitely prefer normal controls. The car feels roomy from the front seats – I haven’t sat in the back of an XTS in a long time. The materials inside are fine.

Altogether I like it (though I wouldn’t buy it) and I do believe there’s a place for it in Cadillac’s lineup – one single car of it’s kind would be fine. However, if an upcoming RWD car comes to replace it – that wouldn’t bother me. I can’t say I really feel “good” driving it like I did my LS460L or my current E63 AMG. But I think the target audience for the XTS has a nice car if they want a Cadillac.

If you liked the Cadillac DeVille or DTS, you SHOULD be happy with this car – you just may need the twin turbo V6…

Cover Your Mouth When You Sneeze, You @$$4013!

You’re an idiot. Well… Maybe you’re not an idiot. But chances are – you’re an idiot. Why? Because I see so many people out there who’s mommy never F’ing taught them to cover their mouth when coughing or sneezing – and you’re probably one of them. Oh, whoop de F’ing do – you turn your head and spit your sh1t all over the room. Thank you so very much! Now your CRAP can float around and enter my body as I breathe it in.

This is especially annoying when you’re stuck in a proximity with one of these mongrels – like on a plane – and have to deal with it and whatever cold or disease you inherit as a result. Cover your F’ing mouth so I don’t have to drink your saliva, you idiot. Is that so difficult? It’s almost as aggravating as the morons who don’t use the turn signal in their automobile. It’s so farking difficult, isn’t it?

Do the world a favor and stop spraying everybody with your dirty spit. Intentionally spitting on another person is an offensive touching that rises to the level of simple assault. So accidentally spitting on somebody isn’t very civilized. C.Y.F.M…