The divorce rate in America is approximately 50%.. I think one of the reasons for this may have something to do with the high expectations we have for our significant others. When you first meet your husband or wife (or girlfriend or boyfriend), you mainly see all the good stuff – especially if the attraction is largely physical (which it often is). If you didn’t live with your husband or wife before you got married, then you never had the chance to see all the pluses and minuses he or she had before you committed. If you did live with one another, than hopefully by the time you got married, you knew what you were getting into. Very few (if any) surprises. Good.

So as the years go by, you start seeing all the not-so-great stuff. Bad or silly habits, mistakes that he or she keeps making over and over (we can’t be good at everything), forgetfulness, bitterness, selfishness… She doesn’t really like giving oral sex (what a surprise), he doesn’t really like candle-lit dinners and chick flicks, maybe he’s not as romantic as he played off to be, maybe she doesn’t really like stupid football. Whatever.

So years go by and along comes Miss/Mr. Perfect. She/He looks great and likes everything you expect him/her to like. The grass is greener. Right? Well there ya go.. You’re actually falling for this again?! This new guy/girl has issues as well. Nobody’s perfect. You just don’t see the big picture yet. So you’re going to screw up your marriage for what? A very similar situation.. And in the end, now you’ve got a new relationship (if you’re lucky) with only a small percentage of time in the “bank”. Since good relationships take time to build – and now you’re starting all over – was/is it really worth it?

At any rate – here’s an interesting chart from www.divorcerate.org

Age at marriage for those who divorce in America
Age———————-Women——Men
Under 20 years old— 27.6% 11.7%
20 to 24 years old— 36.6% 38.8%
25 to 29 years old— 16.4% 22.3%
30 to 34 years old— 8.5% 11.6%
35 to 39 years old— 5.1% 6.5%

Human Beings and Their High Expectations

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